|Meet the Medic|
|Released||June 23, 2011|
Scout:"MOVE CYCLOPS MOVE, Come on come on come on!"
[Demoman and Scout run, as Scout trips and falls to the ground] Scout:"WOAH WHAT THE FU-..."[gets hit by four missiles, landing him on the medic's glass wall] "Medic"
["Meet the Medic" text appears]
Medic:"Ven the patient voke up, his skeleton is missing, AND THE DOCTOR WAS NEVER HEARD FROM AGAIN!!!"
[Medic laughs alone. Half a second later, Heavy laughs with him as he slaps his hand on a tray knocking away the tools on it.]
Medic:"Anyvay that's how I lost my medical license (chuckles as a dove bursts out of heavy's chest) ARCHIMEDES, no! It's filthy in there!,"[Looks at Heavy for a second] "ugh birds hehe"
Medic:"Now, no heart can withstand this voltage, but I'm very certain your heart-"
[Heavy's heart explodes, and the blood spashes on him and one of his birds, making his bird fall off the stand]
Heavy:"What was noise?"
Medic:"The sound of progress my friend."
[Medic goes to his fridge.]
[Medic takes a mega baboon heart revealing a blue spy's head being connected to a potato and electrical meter.]
Blue Spy:"Kill Me."
Medic:"Where was i?, There we go..." [Sticks heart onto a voltage meter. Places it to where the Medigun is pointing and the heart beats faster.]
[The violin/string instrument in background gets faster in sync with the heart.]
Heavy:"Ha.. ha.."[Looks worried]
[A flash of light explodes revealing the screen.]
(The big heart is ubercharged, as it glows red with red-orange glows that look like sillhouette cracks flowing.)
Medic:"Oooh that looks good. Zhere"
[Plops heart in Heavy's cavity.]
Heavy:"Should I be awake for this?"
Medic:"Heh, no. But, as long as you are could you open your ribcage for me? I can't seem to-"
[As Medic tries to open up Heavy's ribcage, they hear a loud crack and Heavy screams and reveals a rib in his hand.]
Medic:"Aw, don't be such a baby, ribs grow back."
[Medic takes the rib and throws it away. Turns around and talks to Archimedes .]
Medic:"No zey don't."
[Medic takes the mounted Medigun and brings it closer to Heavy. His organs and such all regenerate including his shirt and vest.]
Heavy:[Inhales then exhales] "What now Doctor?"
Medic:"Now?"[Chuckles while lifting Heavy up by the hands] "Let's go practice medicine."
[As Medic dresses up and equips his tools, a drum plays in the background. He comes out of a door with shining light behind him and doves flying out.]
[As Medic comes out, Heavy runs forward and Demoman rushes towards Medic in a wheelchair and wrapped in bandages.]
[Demoman gets hit with a rocket sending him flying and landing near Medic. Medic pushes his glasses up and flips some switches on the Medigun, then aims it at Demoman healing him. Demoman gets up whilst removing his cast and bandages. He then quickly nods at Medic and heads back towards battle. Medic sees another wounded person and aims his gun at him. Scout appears in the screen smiling and grows back a missing tooth.]
[Scout springs back up grabbing his baseball bat and runs. He hits a soldier with it around a corner.]
[Heavy is hiding behind a rock with and an army of soldiers advancing towards him.]
Heavy:"DOCTOR! ARE YOU SURE THIS WILL WORK ?"
Medic:"Heheh, I HAVE NO IDEA!"
[Medic flips a few switches on his Medigun revealing a meter that goes to Ubercharge. He aims it at Heavy while he gets out of cover.]
[Heavy turns red with a glassy/shiny texture while the camera shows his heart pumping fast and is redder than usual.]
[Heavy walks towards the army shooting his minigun. A couple of rockets hit him and covers the screen in smoke.]
[Out of the smoke appears two glowing yellow eyes and fully reveals Heavy in his Ubercharged state while walking forward.]
Heavy:"HAHAHAHAH, I AM BULLET-PROOF!!"
[Heavy and Medic walk forwards while it shows Sniper and another mercenary hiding behind a rock showing surprise to Heavy's invincibility. Medic and Heavy both advance while Heavy mows down the enemies while absorbing their rockets.]
[It then shows the feet of the soldiers when they run towards Heavy and Medic with many falling.]
[Then, it shows Heavy and Medic climbing a mound of corpses with a scene of one of their foot stepping on a helmet of a corpse. The helmet is blue with 5 golden stars on it.]
[The music cresendos(is that how u say it? Basically, pitch gets higher) as they climb up and it keeps its pitch when they reach the top. At the top Medic is posing in front of a glowing light while Heavy is slightly below him and to the right of the screen mowing down more enemies. He is still Ubercharged.]