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Meet the Heavy
Meet the Heavy TF2
Released May 14, 2007
Run time 1:29

Synopsis[]

Script[]

["Meet the Heavy" text appears.]

[Heavy walks up to a cardboard box, carrying his minigun Sasha. He promptly slams her on top of the box and takes a seat behind her.]

Heavy: I am Heavy Weapons Guy...

[Heavy pauses for a moment, looks at Sasha.]

Heavy: and this...

[Heavy grasps his gun and gives her a shake.]

Heavy: is my weapon.

[Heavy leans in on the gun.]

Heavy: She weighs 150 kilograms and fires $200 custom tool cartridges at 10,000 rounds per minute.

[Heavy turns his head to the camera.]

Heavy: It costs $400,000 to fire this weapon... for 12 seconds.

[Camera cuts to Heavy bursting out laughing.]

[Heavy then examines his gun, turning the muzzle around where he notices a mark.]

Heavy: Oh my god, who touched Sasha?

[Heavy grasps his gun and looks off camera.]

Heavy: Alright... [Yells.] Who touched my gun!?

[Camera cuts to Heavy blankly staring and thinking for a few seconds.]

Heavy: Some people think they can outsmart me. Maybe. [Sniffles] Maybe.

[Heavy holds a minigun bullet up to the camera.]

I have yet to meet one that can outsmart bullet.

[Camera cuts to Heavy firing his minigun in Dustbowl, mockingly crying. He laughs at his destruction as the camera pans around his head, revealing him to be killing BLU team members.]

Heavy: Cry some more!

[Screen cuts to black.]

Heavy: [Small chuckle.] Cry some more.

[Team Fortress 2 ending flourish music plays.]

Video[]

Trivia[]

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